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OCTOBER | NOVEMBER 2022 • MONTANA SENIOR NEWS
I was in a supermarket one day in the
90s when crowds gathered at the checkout
aisles. Nobody was making any purchases.
The computers were down. Possibly the
power had gone out. In any case, there was
plenty of daylight, so we all could see. But
no transactions occurred.
Confused, I asked an employee how I
could pay for my one item. She directed me
to the store manager. This, more or less,
was our conversation:
Me: Some sort of problem?
Manager: We can’t get the card swipers
to work.
Me: I use cash. Just this loaf of bread for
me today. Here’s the money.
Manager: Sorry, sir. The computers are
down. Without the computers, we don’t
know how much to charge the customers.
Me: I know, since computers came
along, you stopped bothering to put prices
on individual items, but this has the price
on the wrapper — it was printed there by
the manufacturer. So there’s no question
about the price.
Manager: We can’t even open the cash
registers to make change.
Me: I am giving you the exact change, so
you don’t need to give me anything in return.
Manager: That would be fine, but we
can’t scan it, so we can’t sell it to you.
Me: Let me get this straight. I’m in a
supermarket. I want to buy a loaf of bread.
We agree on the price. I am offering you the
money. And you are refusing to accept it just
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MODERN SENIOR 15
because the computer that runs this joint
has to give its blessing to the transaction?
Manager: Nothing can be sold without
first being scanned.
Me: I don’t see what harm would be done.
Manager: The computerized inventory
system would not receive the data needed to …
Me: Here, sir, is the money. If you won’t
take it, I’ll leave it on the counter beside you.
Now I will leave this store carrying this loaf
of bread, and you can resume worshiping
your computer gods, since they, and not the
people, are in charge here.
Manager: If you leave with the bread COME AGAIN?
we’ll call the police. Submitted by Julie Fink/McCartney/
Me: Fine. I will gladly wait for the police, Brantley
and while waiting will use yonder pay- Four women share a birthday and
phone to alert the newspapers, and we’ll let always celebrate it together.
the public judge what kind of place refuses For their 40th birthday they went to
to sell its merchandise to a cash-carrying the Lakeview restaurant because the
customer simply because its computer is waiters were cute and wore tight pants.
out to lunch. For their 50th birthday they went to
Manager: Leave the money and go, but the Lakeview restaurant because the
don’t tell the other customers. We have to prices were reasonable and it had a
keep them waiting until the computers are good wine list.
back up. We can’t sell them a thing until the For their 60th birthday they went to
computers are working just right. the Lakeview restaurant because it was
Motto of this article: Be careful what you quiet and had a nice view.
become dependent upon. MSN For their 70th birthday they went to
the Lakeview restaurant because it was
Arthur Vidro worked for a decade in the stock industry. wheelchair accessible.
Before and after, he wrote newspaper articles and edited a For their 80th birthday they are going
few books. He has served as treasurer of theater and library to the Lakeview restaurant because they
organizations. He’s been cautious with money ever since
a dollar was worth a dollar. have never been there before.
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